A yarzheit candle is lit on the anniversary of the death of a loved one. The anniversary date is based on the Jewish calendar.

Yarzheit [yar-tzhight] is the Jewish practice of remembering the death of a loved one.  It is based on the Jewish calendar.  In our secular society, this anniverary takes a back seat to the “real” annivesary of Simon’s death, January 24, 2005.  Most people, have no idea that there is this other anniversary, the 15th day of Shvat.

I attended synagogue this morning to say mourner’s kaddish, a prayer to remember Simon.  I was surrounded by guests of a bat mitzvah so the overall mood was joyous.  They were there to celebrate the accomplishments of a young girl.  I was there to remember a boy, my son, that will never reach the age of 13. 

I couldn’t say the mourner’s kaddish.  The words were out-muscled by the grief and tears.  The best I could do was move my lips.  I’ve been in a funk all day, which is remarkable considering that this is the “secondary” anniversary.  However, today reminded me of the significance of yarzheit.

It is always great to receive well wishes from friends.  When I receive emails and calls, or friends change their profile pictures on Facebook on January 24, my spirits soar.  This support and recognition is so therapeutic.  However, something magical happened today.

I stood in front of a joyful crowd to recite a prayer to remember my son.  In the midst of their celebration, they paused to acknowledged my grief.  They stood with me as I tried to speak.  They surrounded and supported me.  In a very spiritual and physical way, they lifted me up. 

Community is very important.  Lately, we are obsessed with virtual communities, and impressed by how easy it is to connect with people from around the world.  However, on days like today, I am reminded of the value of “reality communities” and traditions that have endured for thousands of years.  I am also reminded that new calendars and new ways to communicate aren’t always better than the old ones.

By Michael Krone

The Colonial Middle School Student Council is a student government and leadership program that allows students to plan sales of items at lunches and to organize events such as dances and other student- and family-oriented gatherings.

Student council is composed of a sales committee that sells candy and tickets to events at lunch; a special events committee that sells food and prizes at events; an advertising committee that makes posters and endorses the sales and events; and a service committee that helps council give back to the community.

There is also a select executive committee consisting of four officers: Miranda Katz, treasurer; Julia Schumacher, secretary; Michael Krone, vice president; and Brett Paul, president. Our advisor is the enthusiastic and tireless Mrs. Annette Swartz.

December was a busy month for student council, with all sorts of events and sales. First of all, the second week held a sale of delicious chocolate-covered pretzels and was topped off with a sale of Dunkin’ Donuts. All students definitely had full stomachs that weekend.

Before that, volunteers from the service committee donated time to make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for the hungry. During the following week was the holiday party, where teams (designated by a color) made banners, dressed a mascot, wrote a song and competed at the end. The Yellow Team (Go Bananas!) won the showdown.

In addition, there was a sale of the ever-popular Bon Bons, which sold out very quickly.

An event open to all of CMS was bingo night on Friday, Jan. 22. There were many great prizes such as iPods, cameras, and radios.

Members of the executive board will enjoy a reward for their hard work to ensure a fun middle school experience. A Dave and Buster’s night will be held at the Plymouth Meeting Mall on Jan. 27, and all executive board members are invited to attend.

For all members of student council, whether a student is a homeroom representative, officer, or committee member, a personalized CMS Student Council T-shirt will be for sale. The shirts will have the student council logo on the front along with the person’s name on the back. Shirts cost $12 and will be available until Jan. 29.

Furthermore, an all-school Valentine’s Day dance will be held on Feb.12. Tickets cost $8, and that includes refreshments. While students are in the spirit, they can buy candy and cards at lunches to make this Valentine’s Day a special one!

The biggest charity event for student council would have to be the annual Penny Wars. Despite the name, students are welcome to donate more than pennies to the wonderful charities that will be receiving the money.

One charity is the Make a Wish Foundation, which grants wishes to terminally ill children. There is also the Ronald McDonald House, which provides housing to families of patients in local hospitals who are there for an extended period, and Simon’s Fund, which was started by a family in the Colonial School District whose child died of a heart disease and provides EKGs for students. One of these tests revealed the disease in a CMS seventh-grader, who got treated.

We will also be donating to the Kyle Kerpan Fund. Kyle Kerpan would be a member of the graduating class of 2014, one of our current eighth-graders. Unfortunately, Kyle died of a brain tumor in 2007.

And a portion of the money will go to the William Clinton Foundation to aid relief efforts in Haiti. All homerooms will donate, and the class with the biggest total and homerooms that collect more than $250 will be awarded a pizza party.

December and January kept us at student council buzzing around and making our events the best possible — and the future will be no different. Sales of Bon Bons and other food items are always popular among students, and the events make them keep coming back. All members work hard to make sure kids have a great experience at CMS.

Jackie Renfrow - SADS

New chapter stresses need for youth heart exams

By William J. Booher
william.booher@indystar.com

Jackie Renfrow and Norma Johnson take to heart the risks of sudden cardiac arrest.

They know the pain first-hand of suddenly losing young loved ones to undiscovered heart defects.

To reduce the risks for others, Renfrow, 49, Franklin, and Johnson, 63, Fishers, want to raise awareness through the Sudden Cardiac Arrest Association’s new Indy Chapter headed by Renfrow. Johnson is among the first dozen chapter members.

The chapter is stressing the need for detailed heart exams for young people, particularly if they have fainting spells or seizures or a family history of heart ailments. Renfrow said the cardiac arrest deaths earlier this month of University of Southern Indiana basketball senior center Jeron Lewis, 21, and Chicago Bears defensive end Gaines Adams, 26, both from enlarged hearts, are just a couple of the latest tragic losses.

The chapter is emphasizing preparedness to try to prevent deaths when sudden cardiac arrest occurs. The chapter wants more people trained in cardiopulmonary resuscitation and more widespread availability of automated external defibrillators.

The portable defibrillators are designed to enable even the untrained to use them properly. The chapter hopes schools, businesses and sporting events are among gathering sites where they will be readily available.

The Indy Chapter covers the Indianapolis metro area and Southern Indiana.

“If I had read this story 10 years ago, I could have saved both of my kids’ lives,” said Renfrow, manager of food service for Perry Township Schools in Marion County.

Her son, Jimmy Brackett, died at age 22 in 2000, and her daughter Crissy Brackett, died at age 21 in 2002, both from sudden cardiac arrest due to an undiagnosed rare heart condition called long QT syndrome.

Both had a history of occasional seizures, Renfrow said, but in medical exams the cause was not identified.

The heart condition is treatable if diagnosed, she said.

Renfrow and her two grandchildren learned they have the same rare hereditary heart condition after Renfrow’s mother was diagnosed with the condition after a heart episode. Renfrow now has an implanted defibrillator to restart her heart if it stops.

The Brackett siblings had exams of their hearts during physicals for sports, Renfrow said, but not with an electrocardiogram to check the heart’s electrical impulses and an echocardiogram to obtain advanced imaging of the heart.

Also, she said, it is important for someone experienced, such as an electrophysiologist, to properly analyze what those tests show.

Renfrow said someone suffering sudden cardiac arrest will die after about three minutes without being treated with CPR and a defibrillator. This is different from a heart attack, a plumbing problem caused by blockage in the heart’s arteries.

Johnson said her grandson, Clinton Walker, 17, Stockbridge, Ga., died Feb. 7, 2008, of sudden cardiac arrest due to what a coroner’s report determined was sudden cardiac arrest due to congenital heart defects.

“Doctors misdiagnosed him altogether,” Johnson said. “It breaks my heart. We tried to find for so long what was wrong.”

She said doctors felt the seizures he had experienced were due to neurological or psychological problems and did not test his heart.

“You need to look for the signs in your children of having unexplained behavior and seizures. Just don’t accept it, check their heart,” she said.

She said Phillips Temple CME Church, 210 E. 34th St., Indianapolis, where Clinton’s uncle, the Rev. Oliver DeWayne Walker, is pastor, plans to raise awareness of sudden cardiac arrest on Feb. 7.

Additional Facts

Dates are very strange.  Honestly, what is the significance of a date?  For a birthday, are we really that much happier to have the person around on that day?  For an anniversary, do we really appreciate and love the person that much more on that day?  You can tell that my answer is probably no. 

I think about Simon alot.  In fact, grief and sadness does not wait around for important dates.  However, despite this healthy does of cynacism, there is something eerie about his birthday and the anniversary of his death. 

For the past four years, we have gone away for his anniversary.  He died in our house so we don’t want to be here on the night that he died.  It is tragic enough to replay the events of the evening from a resort.  We don’t need to be at the scene. 

Last night was our first 1/24 at home since January 24, 2005.  As we drove back into the neighborhood at 10:45, exactly one hour after we had found Simon, I had flashbacks of the snow and ice covered streets.  I remembered running across my lawn, in slippers through six inches of snow, to a neighbors house as I tried to perform CPR.  I remembered the stillness and quiet as we returned home from the hospital without our son.

As the years go by, the constant intensity of the pain subsides, but the memories and visions remain crystal clear.

Below is a post about how the NFL may start screening the hearts of its athletes.  This comes in the wake of the death of Gaines Adams.  He had an enlarged heart.  This is not the first NFL athlete to die of cardiomyopathy.  I’m surprised that it has taken this long.

The NFL not screening the hearts of its athletes is similar to NASCAR teams not checking the engines of their cars.  I am not comparing a person to a car.  I am stating that owners have a duty to take care of their most valuable assets.  For football, it is the players.  For NASCAR, it is the driver, and yes, your car.  So, check the “engine” on them all.

Posted by Gregg Rosenthal on January 24, 2010 11:57 AM ET

The sudden passing of Bears defensive end Gaines Adams to cardiac arrest caused by an enlarged heart caused many people to wonder if anything could have been done to prevent it.

The NFL is looking closely at the issue.

ESPN’s Chris Mortensen reports that the NFL Cardiovascular Committee is discussing whether to make echocardiograms (or ECHO) standard for players, starting in February with the scouting combine.

The league was already examining the question before Adams’ passing.

Currently the echocardiogram is only ordered if there’s a family history problem or if a problem shows up on the EKG test that is administered to the players.  The echo is “more invasive and expensive but more complete” than the EKG test according to the Chicago Tribune.

MUNCIE — Michelle Friend and others at Huffer Memorial Children’s Center have been overwhelmed by calls this week from confused and concerned parents in the wake of an infant’s death at a Muncie babysitter’s home.

“Our county has now dealt with the devastating blow of having two infants die while in the care of (the same) babysitter,” said Friend, toddler specialist for Huffer’s Child Care Resource and Referral.

This week’s tragedy followed recent reports that Delaware County leads the state in the percentage of pregnant women who smoke. Both second-hand smoke and pregnant women smoking are considered risk factors in Sudden Unexpected Infant Deaths (SUID), many of which are later attributed to Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS).

Matthew Cheng, four months old, died Tuesday afternoon while in the care of Tina Byrd, 3301 W. Noel Drive. On Nov. 3, another baby boy, John K. Wenninger, also died while being cared for by the 43-year-old Byrd. The first child’s death was classified as SUID with the cause undetermined.

City police are continuing their investigation of the Cheng infant’s death and plan to re-interview Byrd once full autopsy results are available.

Huffer’s CCRR is part of a statewide network that provides free information, education and referrals for child care to Hoosiers.

Friend said she wished more parents would contact Huffer for information on SUID, infant death in child-care settings and positional asphyxia. The facility can provide lists of child-care providers, information on safe sleep practices and training for infant care.

Cheng’s death also could be classified as SUID once final toxicology and lab work is completed.

“When there’s absolutely no reason for a baby to die, they call it SUID,” Friend said.

Research shows that male babies are more prone to die of SUID than female infants, and that a SUID death is 18 times more likely to occur with a child sleeping on its stomach.

Friend agreed with medical experts and death investigators that sleeping face down is a risk factor in SUID cases. Byrd indicated that the Cheng infant had rolled over on his stomach when she called emergency dispatchers.

“SUID cannot be prevented or predicted, but knowing the risk factors lowers the occurrence,” Friend said.

The highest risk for SUID or positional asphyxia comes in children six months old or younger, according to Anoinette L. Laskey, a child abuse pediatrician at Riley Children’s Hospital, Indianapolis.

Laskey also serves on Indiana’s Child Fatality Review Team that reviews child deaths in the state.

Even a complete autopsy conducted by a forensic pathologist might not find a cause of an infant death that could be classified as SUID.

Parents and caregivers need to know the safest position for sleeping infants is on their backs, on a firm surface.

“We look for opportunities to prevent such tragedies,” Laskey said.

Ambler Theater

We’re excited to announce that on May 16, 2010, we’ll host our annual fundraiser at the Ambler Theater.  This is an amazing venue.  We’ll have kid movies and kid entertainment.  It will be a great family event.  Stay tuned for more details.

All of the money raised at this event will go to raise awareness about sudden cardiac arrest and death in kids.

This is the second save in one week . . .

Little Rock – A high school athlete passes out at a Tuesday night basketball game.

Chris Winston was heading off the court to the bench when he passed out.  It took a defibrillator to bring him back to life.  Winston was taken to Baptist Health in LIttle Rock.  At last check, he did have a pulse, was being treated with an IV and is expected to recover.

Eerily, this happened at Parkview High School: the same school where Antony Hobbs passed out and ultimately died.  Hobbs’ death led to the push for legislation eventually passed in March 2009, providing funding for AEDs in all state schools.  Budget cuts have prevented some schools from buying the life-saving devices, but the LIttle Rock School District bought the final 78 AEDs needed to equip all of their schools on January 11.